mikhalia

meet mikhalia.  she was my first senior high school photo shoot.  and i co-shot it with a friend, because we were both pretty nervous about it.  but we also had a ton of fun, and she is a beautiful subject to be in front of that camera.

sporty

photos from our crazy weekend of sports...a spartan football game saturday and a tigers baseball game sunday.  

we had really high up seats in the way corner at msu, as we took the kids there for their first junior spartan game.  we brought along heather, and really had a fun time.

then onto sunday...a friend gifted us her first row third baseline tigers tickets.  they were awesome seats.  harper was handed a baseball by the pitching coach on the way to the dugout right before the game started.  and we almost got pelted by a foul ball line drive, hitting the mats right in front of us.  through slight drizzles, we stayed to the very end.  

just ballet.

this week, we went back to the barre in the dance studio.  harper thought about her options at the end of dance last spring, and initially said she didn't want to dance again at all.  when i explained that she could try a different class- tap, jazz or ballet by itself- she perked up and said that she wanted to do "just ballet."  her reasoning?  she didn't like the look of the black jazz shoes.



we talked about it all summer, and repeatedly confirmed her choice, to make sure she was happy with it.  last weekend, we went and picked out a new leotard, this time all pink, and new shoes, since she grew out of the ones i bought with only 3 weeks left in dance last year.



on the way to the studio, she asked if the teacher would be the same.  if the room would be the same.  if the students would be the same.  i assured her about the teacher and the room, but couldn't confidently say that each girl in last year's class would be returning to a "just ballet" class this year.  turns out about half returned, which helped, but there were a ton of new faces, too.  she walked in confidently, but i peered through the mirror a few minutes later, and she was being held by her dance teacher.  apparently, she was a bit sad and shy about all the new girls.  i don't think it helped that she was exhausted now that she's in a full-day of kindergarten.

we successfully twirled and pointed our way through day 1, and she does seem excited.  on the way home, she informed me, however, that after this year, she didn't want to take dance again.  i asked why, and she explained that it was because there would probably be too many kids in her dance class next year whom she didn't know.  i thought for a moment about how to approach this parenting moment...i applauded her for deciding to stick it out for this year, and not give up on dance.  i praised her for accepting this new challenge of a dance class with lots of little girls she doesn't know.  i also explained that she can do anything she wants to do as long as it makes her happy.  that she didn't have to not do something just because there might be people she doesn't know.  that if dancing makes her happy and it's something she enjoys doing, then by all means, go out and dance, and who cares who's watching. that she shouldn't let anyone stop her from doing what she loves and what makes her happy.



 i heard from the backseat a mild and meek and tired "ok."  i have a feeling this is only the first of many of these conversations we'll be having, and it won't always be about taking a ballet 1 class.  it's a conversation i have with myself many times, when i have to remember just to dance without caring, and to be a positive role model for my girls who are always watching even when i may not know it.

the harper & crosby project - august 2013

i have finally caught up and am posting the project 365 month that just ended a mere 9 days ago.  what a relief.  i was so worried that this project would take forever to re-do in a better way, but it has taken me a million times less time than i thought.  so here it is, august's 365 project.

repeat to self...i will not get back logged on my blog.  i will not get back logged on my blog...so much on my mind and in my camera.  will be back soon, promise.  i have first day of school photos to share, as well as a couple beautiful high school seniors to spotlight. ♥  

on the eve of kindergarten

as i opened my laptop to write this post, my reminder popped up for tomorrow- "first day full kindergarten."  as if i needed one more reminder to literally send me over the edge.  this is a tough post to write, but inevitably the day would come.  so here goes.

a letter to my little girl.



for my harper,

how did we get to this day.  how did 5 years fly by so quickly, to the night before i walk you to the bus stop and watch you climb aboard and wave goodbye as you head off to your new school for your first full day of kindergarten.  i don't know how we got here, but i know you're ready.  and i know that, as nervous as you are right now, you will be ok.  you always are.

this morning during orientation, when we walked into your classroom and met your new teacher, i could feel your hand squeeze mine just a bit tighter, and your body inch just a bit more snuggly with mine.  and my heart ached.  i so badly wanted to pick you up and run back into the parking lot and drive back home with you.  but then we found your seat and you were asked to color and write your name and you loosened up and you maybe even smiled.  you love to color.  you love to write.  and i think you'll find that you will love so much more about kindergarten.



you have expressed to us your worries about the bus, and your worries about meeting new friends in school, and that there are a lot of boys in your class and you just don't like boys.  and hey, my love, that's ok.  really, it is.  but you are personable and a social butterfly and a leader, and i just know you will walk our of that room in june with everyone as your friend.  you find something good in everyone you meet. you are extremely positive and you radiate joy.  you are a beautiful little soul and you have brought so much happiness to our lives.  i can't believe most days that i am lucky enough to be your mama.  you have changed me for the better, opened my eyes to new clothing styles, new imaginary games, new elaborate stories, new food combinations.



as emotional and teary-eyed as i have been for the past few days, especially tonight, and will most certainly be tomorrow morning as we make our way to your bus stop, i know deep down that you will soar.  you will rock this year of kindergarten and do amazing things.  you will wow and dazzle and shine, because that's who you are.  you are bright and intelligent.  you are witty and funny.  you are a conversationalist and a lover of chatter.  you are independent and strong-willed.  you are a kindergartener and you are ready.



i love you to the moon and back.  i love you oodles of noodles.  i love you a bushel and a peck.  i can't tell you enough how proud i am of you and how i love to just watch you be who you are.  i have a front row seat to one of the greatest shows on earth.  happy kindergarten-eve, my harper bean.  you will do many great and wonderful things, and i can't wait to see them.

love, mommy